Tuesday, July 7, 2009

learning as I go

Being a parent is a difficult thing. Rewarding, yes. But, never easy.

I can spend hours reading all of the parenting manuals at the nearest Barnes and Noble, including the one my pal Mike in Nashville wrote, in which I was fortunate enough to pen the foreword and watch his gem become a bestseller, yet in the end, we...gulp...are the ones making the right, or wrong, choices for our children.

No pressure.

Starting out, it seemed so easy. Change a diaper, warm a bottle, and take lots of photos that will later be produced for one of those embarrassing wedding videos. Lack of sleep was probably my biggest complaint in those days, only to be joined by backfat and an expanded waistline, but those don't weigh much on life's priority scale. Kids need more than just healthy snacks and good study habits, and the challenges get more difficult as they age. Throw in the chaos of life, and it's like playing the advanced level of a video game blindfolded. After all, there are dentist appointments to keep, dry-cleaning to pick up, and kids' bangs to trim. All the while offering good advice, steering them toward good influences, and hoping they ignore our inevitable mistakes.

And so last night, between a talk with my oldest who asked if prayers for Papaw to be alive could come true, and practicing giving eyedrops to a stuffed animal in hopes that he can conquer the task of wearing contacts, I realized more than ever the role of a parent.

We shape lives. And before we know it, they're off to live them.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh, Deb...

I'm not having a good day and this just put me in tears for like the 4th time today...

If only prayers would bring Dad back!

K

deb said...

Kris,

I'm sorry it upset you. That was me last night, wondering if the answers I have for Griff, and Hayden, are the right ones.

I'll call soon to check on you.

Love,
Deb

Nickie Eisele said...

I know words are not always a comfort, but know that you are a wonderful mother. I've told you for years that I idolize you as a mother. You have faced some many challenges in just the past few years, yet you always remain strong even though I know you may not feel that way inside. Griffin and Hayden are so blessed to have you as their mother. The smiles on their faces when you walk in the room say it all. You have and continue to show them the way which is why they are such wonderful children. As parents, our answers may not be right or may not be perfect. We may never be able to explain things to them that we can't explain ourselves. But, the love that you show them will carry them through as it is always the right answer. I will continue to look up to you and support you in any way that I can. Now, did I tell you that you're a wonderful mother? :) Love ya, Nick

Denise said...

I'm ready for Mike to write a new book! Julie and I worked together at BSU and have kept in touch ever since. What great people they are!